I Need to be A Walkie Talkie

“ But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection,lest when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.” 1 Corinthians 9:27

      “ Above Reproach”- Two simple little words that hold so much strength and power. Being a christian, I am an ambassador, I’m suppose to be an example of what it looks like for someone to follow Christ and can I just tell you....it’s not easy. It’s rewarding and it’s the better life, worth living but it is by no means easy.
    I have found myself in moments when I’m exhausted and wondering why I have to always be the “bigger” person, or have patience or be kind and gentle even though a lot of the times it’s not my nature to be so. The Lord is ever faithful and always brings me back to a place where He ever so lovingly reminds me of not only what He has already done for me, but also that He has redeemed me for a specific purpose.
      God has a plan for me, individual and specific for who I am and what I’ve been though. There are lessons that I have to learn, there are experiences that I have already been through that are also a part of the plan He has for me. The Lord has allowed me to go through things in my life, not only to strengthen me and bring m closer to Him, but to also be able to come along side other people that have struggled through the same things I have and be able to encourage them, and point them to Christ during their hard times.
    However, if I am not walking the walk while I’m talking the talk, then all of what I can instill into people or the encouragement I can offer becomes useless. Nobody wants to be lectured, especially not by someone that isn’t even doing what they are telling you you should do.
     So why do I have to be above reproach? Why do I have to make sure that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing and specifically what the Lord is calling me to? Because if I don’t I myself am nailing a door of outreach and encouragement shut, and that’s not what the Lord intended for me, and who am I to go against the Will of God?

Application:
  Today I commit to be purposeful with my actions and make sure that I am diligently doing the tasks set before me, and slow to speak but quick to listen.

Confessions of A Non Runner

1 Corinthians 9: 24 “ Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may obtain it”

       So I’ve never really been a runner...at all. It’s just not my thing, the concept of mindlessly running for miles and miles on end is just not appealing to me, nor do I have the endurance to run for miles and miles on end. So this analogy has always been a hard one for me to track with the entire way through...
        Ok, let’s say I’m in a race, a 5k, there are hundreds of people running alongside next to me, assuming that I make it to the finish line ( hey a girl can dream right?...it is metaphorical after all) if I’m not the first one to cross it, then I ran for no reason, I didn’t get the prize, all the sweat, tears ( and trust me if I were running a 5K there would be tears) and effort I put into the race would be useless. Yeah I’d get a good work out but in the big picture I didn’t accomplish my goal.
         Can I just take this moment to say that I am SO thankful God does’t follow earthly rules because if He did...I’d be screwed. I’m not the best runner and I’m definitely not the best christian that’s ever existed, or the best christian currently on the planet or even in this room. The thing is that this verse isn’t calling us to be the best, but do our best, there’s a difference. We’ve all heard it before “ there will always be someone who can do it better”, but with God it isn’t about what we accomplish for Him, but the heart we have while we are doing it. When Paul talks about running, it’s not physically ( PRAISE THE LORD!) but spiritually, I am to strive to do my very best and rely on the Lord to carry me to and through the finish line. I can try to do it on my own strength, but chances are I’d pass out half way through, not even coming into view of the finish line.
 

Application: I will spend 30 minutes trying to translate this metaphor into one that I can actually relate to, in an effort to further break this one apart.

The Better Life

“and everyone who competes for the prize is temperate in all things.Now they do it to obtain a perishable crown, but we for an imperishable crown” 1 Corinthians 9:25

     This immediately makes my brain jump to  Matthew 6:19-20 “ do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal ; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven where neither moth nor rust destroy and where thieves do not break in and steal”.
    I just turned 19 years old, so there I’ve never really had to worry about a 401 k or retirement fund or any of that, but I have definitely had my fair share of experiences where I have had to refocus and realize that the “prize” I’m striving for is not one of this world, but a heavenly one.
      Ever since I can remember I have loved school ( except for math) I genuinely love to  learn new things, I don’t know why it just excites me, I’ve always done well in academics. I was always in advanced classes, I went to a high school that allowed me to earn my AA degree for free before I even technically had graduated from high school, I had multiple scholarships and grants offered  to me when I graduated, not to mention the two years I shaved off my college time.
     From a worldly stand point I was on my way to making it big. I had planned my life out already, go to school another 4 ears, get my masters in Mental Health Counseling, work for a church, but do some free lance work on the side and pretty much be set for the rest of my life, regardless of whether or not I married someone with a good job.
      In the midst of my planning, and at the end of my senior year, God decided to intervene in my life and put going to Potter’s Field into my heart. But taking a year off would meant I lost my scholarships, lost time and momentum that I would never get back. So I was faced with a hard decision, stay or go? Continue running the race for an earthly reward that I was justifying in my head ( if I work at a church, aren’t I doing the Lord’s will?) or take myself out of the race and join a completely new one?
     If I’m being honest, I went back and forth so many times between staying and going, the arguments I had with myself would rival any day time soap opera, but at the end I couldn’t ignore that Call I knew God Himself had placed in my life.
     I waited until the very last minute I could, and I called the scholarship office and let them know my plans. I’m sharing this not to boast about me or my accomplishments, because at the end of the day whatever knowledge, opportunities or scholarships I was blessed with I only received by the Grace of the Lord, but to show your my frame of mind at the time, and to highlight that there is a good life, and then there is a better life. The better life won’t always seem appealing or easy, or comfortable, actually for the most part it will never look like that. But we are running a different race, with different rules, and the prize is so much better.
     If I had to do it all over again, I wouldn’t have done anything differently, I don’t regret losing the money, or time or momentum because what I gained in exchanged was so much better, I gained the opportunity to live my life and run my race in a way that is genuinely pursuing the prize of Heaven, and an intimacy with Christ that can not be bought, or taught in any university out there.


Application:
    i commit to seeking the Lord for 20 minutes tonight on a crossroads decision I have to make, making sure I’m making the best life decision

I'm Proud to be an American....and Hispanic

1 Corinthians 9:22b-23 “ I have become all things to all men, that I by all means might save some. Now this I do for the gospel’s sake, that I may be partaker of it with you”

   This verse is one I know very well. It seems like for most of my life I have had two distinct parts of me. There is the american me, the Monica that has gone to public school her entire life, that knows all the current pop culture, slang, music and knows the American way, and then there’s the 1/3 Cuban, 1/3 Costa Rican Monica, the Monica that speaks Spanish, has certain cultural mannerism and can easily fall into line with different cultures.
   I’ve taken my heritage for granted for most of my life, mostly because of the fact that I’ve grown up in a city where about 90% of the other inhabitants have similar cultural backgrounds. It wasn’t until I came up to Montana that I felt the cultural differences highlighted. Certain comments or preconceived notions ( all innocently expressed) I noticed would catch me off guard or would make me take a step back. I knew none of them were malicious in intent or meant to be hurtful, but for the first time in my life I didn’t feel american. I very quickly started to resent that I could speak spanish and that I didn’t have blond hair, light eyes and the fact that when I speak, it’s mostly with my hands.
    God is sovereign though and has showed me that He has given me the ability to speak spanish and to adapt easily to culture so that I can help further His work, especially now that I am being deployed to a Spanish speaking, Hispanic country.
    As ambassadors of Christ it is essential that we don’t pledge our hearts to any specific culture, but to the Word of God instead. The word of God transcends all culture, but it’s delivery many times has to adapt itself to the current surrounding and local people. When I fly to Guatemala I can try and minister to people in english, but my chances of it being effective are lower than if I did it in Spanish, ( not that God can’t use non spanish speakers to minister to the locals, but you get the point) I could try using american cartoons to illustrate a biblical principle but if they’ve never seen it before its a moot point. When I’m sharing Christ, I stand firm on the foundation of Biblical Truth that I have learned, but I make myself completely flexible to it’s delivery.
   I still struggle sometimes with the differences I see, but it’s allowing God to teach me to trust Him, trust that He gave me my hair and eye color for a reason, trust that He’s blessed me with the ability to speak more than one language, and blessed me with the opportunity to grow up experiencing multiple cultures for a reason, even if it’s not crystal clear at the moment.
  I have not committed my life to reaching a certain group of people in a specific way, I have committed my life to the spreading of God’s word, and Love to all people, in whatever way I can until the WHOLE world hears.

Application: God has made me me, and I need to start learning to accept that, so I will commit to make psalm 139 mine personally and memorize it, not just in repetition, I also  will begin to pray for the people of the country, in a hope that God gives me a burden for them

Little Miss Imperfect

“ Not that I have already attained or am already perfect but I press on,that I may layhold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me” - Phillipians 3:12

     It’s crazy for me to think that I’ve already entered my third month here at Potter’s Field. It seems like only yesterday that the 12 of us met in the haze of that first day, but here we are 63 days later and closer than I ever thought we could ever get.
    The Lord has definitely met me here, taught me lesson after lesson and opened my eyes times and time again to truths that I was for so long blind to. The Monica that I see today in the mirror is definitely not the same girl that I was when I got here and I praise the Lord for His Faithfulness and His willingness to continue to teach me and mold me despite my pride and foolish ways ( see what I did there? hehe).
    Does that mean that I’m done? Now that I can actually see growth in myself dos that mean I’ve reached the pinnacle end all be all in my growth adn relationship with the Lord?...pft! NOPE!
     If there is one thing that the Lord has shown me time and time again, especially in the last few days is that I wil never achieve perfection ( man was that a hard lesson for me to learn) nor will I ever reach a point in my walk with Him where I get a retirement plan and slow down, nor is that something I want to do.
    I need to push through and continue steadfastly in my walk, and this mentality should not be limited to times of trouble or trial, but should be at the forefront of my mind during the good times as well. Yay! I’m delighting myself in the Lord, walking with Him daily and  growing more and more everyday, I need to persevere with this attitude.
    I’m scared to grow complacent with my walk, I’m genuinely scared that this Love I have for God will one day become common place and that in my comfort I will stop strive to perfect myself in Him, or work towards the plans He’s specifically laid out for me.
    I love the last part of the verse, “ that I may layhold of that which Christ Jesus laid hold of me”. I get this picture of my head of Christ grabbing me out from the depth so that I could with the same fervor and love grab ahold of the plans that He has for my life.
    In the same way that He never ceases to have a desire for me to be with Him and He never grows weary of pursing me, may I never become weary or pursuing Him and may I never cease to desire to be within His will, accomplishing the work that He rescued me for.

Application:
     I commit to praying for a fresh baptism of the Holy Spirit every single day first thing every morning from now until October.

It's Not a Hobby

Philippians 3:10 “ that I may know Him and the power of the resurrection and the fellowship of the sufferings being conformed to His death”

power of the resurrection
the fellowship of His sufferings
conformed to His death

    Those are some pretty heavy things to make your own. I many times find myself underestimating or not fully grasping the reality and depth of what the Lord has accomplished for my sake.
      Being a christian is not defined by your sunday schedule, your vocabulary or the super secret apple pie recipe that has been passed down from one church bake sale to another.
       To know God and the power of His resurrection, take a second to think about it, go on, I won’t be offended...

     Pretty amazing huh? I was just thinking about it and trying to wrap my mind around a full and complete concept of God...it gave me a head ache. Through Christ I have the power to intimately spend time with the very entity that spoke the complexity of the universe into existence.....what?!
      There is a true depth to this relationship I have with Christ, it entails persecution, trial and low valleys just as much as it entails love, hope, joy and peace.
     This is REAL.To limit it only to a hobby or a time slot in your schedule is pretty much blasphemous. My relationship with God is continuously transforming me, and the second that it’s not, it probably means that I’ve lost sight of the magnitude of the amazing opportunity that I have in having true communion with the Living and Loving God.
     For me personally, I’ve tried christianity as simply a hobby or a filler in one of my time slots, but now that I have embraced it fully and have experienced it in the way God originally intended for me to experience it...I can never go back. Im no longer content with settling in my relationship with Christ, I don’t just want to brilliant sunday morning smiles, and the cheesy Christianese phrases. I want the messy, hard, painstakingly impossible, all of it, every single aspect of being in a relationship with Christ, from being conformed to His death, to partaking in the fellowship of His suffering and especially the power of the resurrection.

God Does Not Work Like Chuck E. Cheese

“ and be found in Him, not having my own righteousness, which is from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which is from God by faith.”
Philippians 3:9

 Righteousness as defined by the dictionary on my computer, is a noun, the quality of being morally right or justifiable.
       So wait, you mean to tell me that I can’t be righteous by my own strength? What is this? So you mean to tell me that all those volunteer hours I put into Children’s ministry, and all the time I spent making operation Christmas child show boxes and going around town feeding the homeless won't justify me or my mistakes?! Who came up with this rule?!
      It’s ridiculously hard for me personally to remember that my works, and acts of service are not what reconcile me to God.I can’t save up all of my servant time hours and then go to God and buy His Love or justify myself to Him, it doesn’t work that way.
      I’ve found myself countless of times hoping that if I just serve more people, or spend more time doing “godly” acts that it would in some way, shape or form grant me favor with God, or exalt me in His presence,and that is exactly the opposite of what He finds pleasing.
      Hebrews 6 says that it is impossible to please God without faith. It’s when I have faith in Him, when I trust that He is in control of my life and have hope in Who He is and what He has done for me, that I truly start to  be pleasing in His sight. It seems ironic and almost comical to me even as I’m typing this out, the very thing that I so many times place my hope in to bing me favor with God, is the thing that many times keeps me from it. When I’m relying on my works, I’m taking the faith I should be putting in God and placing it in me and what I can do, or accomplish... talk about twisted.
     Now don’t get me wrong, works are a good thing I think James says it best in verse 22 of his second chapter “ Do you see that faith was working together with his works, and by works faith was made perfect?”. We can’t just stop at faith, if I had all the faith in the world but never used it to move the mountains that God has asked me to move then why have faith in the first place. Being active and engaged in the work of His Kingdom is not a bad thing at all. I just need to make sure I’m checking my motives and ensuring that when I do step out and do a work it’s been directed by my Faith in God and not being used as a way to get to God.

Application:
     Today when I serve or do a “godly” task I will pray that the spirit makes me sensitive and convict me the second my heart starts to lean on those actions to justify  me and my failures.

That's Garbage!

“ Yet, indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and counted them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ.” Philippians 3:8

     The end of this verse really stuck out to me. I have suffered the loss of all things and counted them as rubbish, hmm....I don’t know about you but when was the last time that you were sad when you saw the garbage truck take away your trash?
    Why would someone suffer the loss of trash? Why would they miss it at all?
     But the thing is... don’t we all? We have been cleansed of our filth and the wicked ways which we have walked, yet many times I find that I can’t stop looking back. If you know me at all, you know that I think ...way too much...about everything. It’s a gift when used in the way the Lord wants, but apart from that it can become a curse ( doesn’t everything pretty much work like that). I’ve often found myself reminiscing on the days of my rebellion, and not in a negative way either. I’ve found myself in the sandals of the Israelite crying out for the onions of Egypt, I’ve been Lot’s wife as she takes that one last fatal look at Sodom and Gomorra...but the question still begs...why!?
     If I’ve given my life, my all, to Christ then why is it that even though I mentally count all of my past experiences without Christ as rubbish that a part of me continues to mourn and suffer their loss, even if it’s only a little bit?
   For me personally, the Lord has shown me that while I’m quick to offer up my best to Him, I still haven’t fully grasp the art of giving Him my bad. Instead of releasing the burden of my failures and mistakes, instead of surrendering the years that the locust have eaten away and accepting redemption, instead of giving HIm my heart the good and the plain gross, I’ve only offered up the better half. I’m still carrying the bad with me, the reason that I turn back to those times is because I still carry them with me. I’m still carrying around a decaying corps with me, of course I’m going to get a whiff of the stench every now and then and be reminded of who the corpse was and what it did.
     But God has shown me that I really am a new creation in Him, and that He’s seen the dead carcass the entire time, psalm 139, He knows me, He sees my heart, I cannot be hidden from Him especially not now that I’m His daughter. It’s time to drop the carcass and embrace the freedom of forgiveness. It’s only when I finally truly count it as loss to carry around my burdens, that I’ll finally fully gain CHrist.
    And while this is drenched in Christianese and cheesy saying we have all heard before, it is true, it is genuine and for the first time God is showing me that those “cheesy” phrases can many time hold the keys to unlocking the shackles around your feet, if you’ll only be willing to let them truly sink in.
   Want to know something else?....
“ And I will restore to you the years that the Locust have eaten...”- Joel 2:25

Application:
         I will recite Joel 2:25 when I feel the weight of my past start to creep in on me, and go to someone I trust and share my burden and be transparent with them.